What We Publish

Linguisless welcomes submissions including, but not limited to:

• satirical or suspiciously sincere linguistics papers;
• corpus studies based on datasets nobody should realistically have collected;
• multimodal analyses containing excessive arrows and circles;
• discourse analyses of internet phenomena that disappeared three weeks ago;
• theoretical frameworks built primarily out of academic confidence;
• fake field reports;
• implausible minimal pairs;
• syntax trees applied to memes for reasons that become less clear over time;
• papers that begin ironically but accidentally discover something insightful.

We are particularly interested in work occupying the unstable space between:

“this is genuinely clever”

and

“this should probably not exist.”

What We Do Not Publish

We do not publish:

• actual hate speech or harassment;
• targeted attacks on specific living individuals;
• content that is merely cruel without being intellectually interesting;
• pseudoscience presented sincerely;
• AI output generated without at least minimal human suffering;
• papers whose only joke is "linguists are weird." We are aware.

Peer Review Process

1. Submission received
2. Editorial panic
3. Paper opened during coffee break
4. Reviewer assignment determined largely by who is currently online
5. If funny: accepted surprisingly quickly
6. If unfunny: rejected using professionally vague language
7. If incomprehensible but confidently written: sent for theoretical review
8. Publication scheduled for a future issue, unless we become impatient

Average review time currently ranges from:

“remarkably efficient”

to

“we forgot.”

Ethical Statement

Authors are expected to maintain basic academic integrity, including:

• citing sources when possible,
• fabricating data responsibly,
• and limiting theoretical inflation to academically survivable levels.

If your paper accidentally becomes meaningful, please notify the editors immediately.